Human Design Manifestors in Relationships

Watch "Living With Repelling Aura" on our Youtube Channel

Are you a Manifestor? Do you know one?

The odds of meeting a Manifestor are rare to unlikely because they are nine percent of the population.

If you don’t know any Manifestors, you won’t be familiar with their incredibly independent and strongly felt energy.

Or you may be familiar with it and not know what it’s all about.

You may have come to a wrong conclusion about them because the energy felt uncomfortable.

If you ARE a Manifestor and new to Human Design, you may not understand how valuable it is to spend time getting to know the other types.

If you ARE NOT a Manifestor...

How do you get to know Manifestors if they are so rare?
Are your relationships with Manifestors peaceful or challenging?

Ra Uru Hu, the founder of Human Design, describes the Manifestor energy as “repelling.”

If you are new to Human Design, you may be turned off by that word.

You may not yet see the whole picture and purpose of the repelling aura of a Manifestor.

And in everyday life, repelling is a word we shy away from using because we don’t want to hurt someones feelings.

Regardless, everyone is missing out on beautiful Manifestor relationships. - They have tremendous mutual benefits.

I've had the opportunity to meet many Manifestors, as a nurse, therapist, and coach. With their permission, I could easily find out their Human Design. - This helped me compare their behaviors to their chart details. I could reflect on my experiences with them and learn.

With that said, I find it tricky to write and speak about Manifestors.

Generators, Manifesting Generators, and Projectors are easy to write about because they are plentiful and I meet them most often in my coaching practice.

These types thrive in coaching and counseling containers because their strategy for success depends on interaction with the outside world.

When they understand and use their strategy correctly, they remind me of a field of marigolds on a sunny day. - They shimmer with delight because they have found the secret to freedom, opportunity, health, and success.

For context: The other Human Design types, Generators, Projectors, and Reflectors, respond to external stimuli or invitations. - Manifestors decide, inform, and initiate action independently.

Their strategy for success does not rely on collaboration with the outside world.

Manifestors initiate themselves. They invite and respond to themselves. It is independent and private.

This private process means they don't speak much about their inner world. They don’t feel the need to.

As a result, the rest of us who have them as friends, partners, children, and colleagues may struggle to understand, relate and get along with them. Their experience is outside our knowledge base, and they are not inclined to explain themselves or verbally explore their decisions and actions.

I observe Manifestors in couples therapy.

As they relate and communicate with their Projector or Generator partners and children, I am learning what is easy or difficult for them in relationships.

The Two Main Reasons Manifestors Seek Help

1. Difficulty relating to themselves

This happens when trust in their internal process and connection to self is offline. If they seek help to understand themselves, they go against what is natural for them. They are asking for help to be a Manifestor. A person who is supposed to be an independent decision-maker, informer, and action-taker.

To illustrate being offline: A Manifestor pleaded with me to tell them what to do for work. They had become very ill from stress and the physicality of their job. We had a coaching session, and I gave them referrals and resources.

They concluded that I had not helped them at all.

By the way... All Human Design types can use their strategy, authority, and deductive reasoning to figure out whether a career or job is right for them. You can discuss it, with others but no one can tell you what to do. That’s what your strategy and authority are for. They clarify your decisions. It is the same for Manifestors.

This leads me to the second reason Manifestors seek help.

2. Difficulty relating to others

Manifestors most often ask for help with relationship conflicts and finding and maintaining friendships and intimate partnerships.

They say they don't understand why they "push" people away.

They recognize that they have lost out on people and things that mattered to them and wonder what they are missing.

Their non-Manifestor partners ask for help "getting close to" and being heard by their Manifestor partner.

What it takes for a Manifestor to ask for help

You may not know this about Human Design Manifestors, but they are not designed to need or ask for help.

If they can get themselves to ask for help, they can remain stuck because of their natural resistance to asking, needing, accepting, and using the direction they receive.

Asking for help when you are not inclined to do so is emotionally uncomfortable, frustrating, angering, and mind-bending.

Here are a few examples of Manifestors asking for help and informing at the same time:

In their written application, a Manifestor wanted me to know that they "didn't take direction well and don't like being told what to do."
After downloading a free resource for Manifestors, another informed me they were "triggered" because the word "don't" appeared in the copy.
And another said they loved their Manifesting Generator partner very much, but "I don't really need [them]."

Manifestor Relationship Problems

Manifestors do not tolerate well having their internal decision-making process investigated, questioned, challenged, or intruded upon whether it's well-meant or vital to someone else's process. This makes counseling and coaching containers tricky to navigate for both the Manifestor and the advisor.

Collaboration, teamwork, consensus, informing, and understanding the external process of others do not naturally occur to Manifestors, nor are they inclined to be curious or interested in it.

For the rest of us, understanding the expression of the Manifestor personality can be equally challenging. It can bring out defensive, insistent, and pursuit-like behaviors that confuse and anger Manifestors. Frustration, anger, and communication breakdown quickly follow.

Reflecting on my experience with Manifestors has brought me to a place of compassion. They are easily misunderstood and rejected. It's a solitary experience or theme. It can be lonely. They have a very independent "I don't need anyone" energy, but like most people, they yearn for connection.

My interactions with them make me curious and thoughtful about my responsibilities to the relationship as well as the effectiveness of my communication.

As mentioned, one of the undeniable characteristics of Manifestors is their repelling energy. - If you are a Manifestor, you will recognize it from your life experience.

As you study Human Design and reflect on your past and present interpersonal experiences, you will come to understand its purpose and effect on others.

This video "Living With Repelling Aura" may shed some light on the subject.

Keep in mind that I am a Splenic Projector and this is my understanding and subjective experience of the Manifestors I've met in my practice.

My Manifestor Experiences

Because of the rarity of Manifestors, I extended an invitation to the members of Human Design In Action so everyone could learn and share their Manifestor experiences. Well, the post took on a life of its own.

It became an opportunity to learn from Manifestors who were willing to let people into the experience of their inner and outer world.

What I most loved about the thread was the chance to see the contrast in their emotional states of peace and anger. Because of the main reasons Manifestors enter my world, I rarely see their peaceful state.

It was also interesting to observe the reactions of enthusiasm, resistance, and anger to the content and comments in the thread. One person stated they would only read the post and not the comments. It was unexpected but educational.

It illustrates the need for examining our Human Design practice. Is it in motion or not? We can either be satisfied with surface HD ear-candy, or look at ourselves honestly, no matter how uncomfortable.

A Mother and Her Manifestor Son

One poignant contribution came from the mother of a young Manifestor boy. She wrote passionately about growing closer to him because she took deliberate action to learn about his Manifestor worldview and experience.

Her application of Human Design became a lifeline to understanding, relating, and preparing her son for life in a primarily Generator world. That is an experience I could never write about. She did it inside our group. It's a must-read.

Fyi, inside our Facebook Community Human Design in Action, you will find referrals to Manifestor resources. You will also read their comments and reactions to the other Human Design types. Join us and have a look around! Type "Manifestor" in the search field.

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